Just because he’s Mr. Universe and the Terminator, that doesn’t mean Arnold Schwarzenegger doesn’t have a soft side. In fact, Commando himself once directed a made-for-TV remake of the holiday classic Christmas in Connecticut. On the surface, this seems beyond inexplicable, but as the recent Netflix docuseries about Arnold revealed, the Terminator had a deep desire to become as American as apple pie. Schwarzenegger adores everything Americana and his foray into directing speaks volumes about the side of his personality that wouldn’t fully emerge until decades later when he ran for political office. As we revisit this intriguing but not exactly stellar film, we’ll see what it says about Arnold as a person. We’ll also discover the answer to a burning question: can Arnold Schwarzenegger direct?
What Is 'Christmas in Connecticut' About?
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Arnold Schwarzenegger’s 1992 made-for-TV film Christmas in Connecticut is a remake of the 1945 classic and stars Dyan Cannon, Kris Kristofferson, and Tony Curtis. It originally aired on TNT and received a couple of negative reviews but was mostly ignored. The story revolves around Elizabeth Blane (Cannon), the host of a cooking show who can’t actually cook, and Jefferson Jones (Kristofferson), a heroic forest ranger. Jones becomes a TV news sensation after rescuing a boy stranded in the Rocky Mountains. Somehow Jones’ home burns down in a fire while he’s rescuing the boy and the only item recovered from the charred remains is one of Blane’s cookbooks. So Blane’s manager/producer Alex (Curtis) gets the bright idea of filming a live special in which Blane cooks Jones a Christmas dinner. Hijinks ensue as Blane attempts to film the special while also hiding the fact that she can’t cook and doesn’t have a family.
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Is Arnold Schwarzenegger's 'Christmas in Connecticut' Any Good?
A lot about the story’s setup feels unnecessarily illogical and complicated. If Jones doesn’t know anything about Blane, why does he have one of her cookbooks? How did his house burn down? Why would Blane pretend to have a fake family in her TV special considering it would be incredibly easy to figure out that her “husband” is her manager and her “son-in-law” is an actor? Why would she pretend to have a family in general; wouldn’t it just be a matter of time before this lie is revealed to the public? Perhaps these questions all amount to nitpicks rather than fatal flaws but they’re just the beginning of the film’s problems.
The film’s gravest sin is that it isn’t funny but tries so hard to be. All the attempts at comedy feel like total amateur hour. The film makes the rookie mistake of thinking that the audience will laugh if its characters are cartoonish and their performances are over the top. There’s an over-reliance on bumbling physical humor that feels totally manufactured. It also doesn’t help that every comedic character is a showbiz cliche: the crazy manager, the pretentious method actor, and the superficial female celebrity.
Despite all this, Kristofferson and Cannon actually have pretty good chemistry. They might be the only thing about the film that is above average. They’re believable as a couple and make the whole “opposites attract” idea work reasonably well. They make a valiant attempt to prevent the film from going completely off the rails. If there is anything effective in Christmas in Connecticut — anything that makes the viewer feel those warm, cozy sensations that holiday movies are meant to evoke — it’s entirely because of the two leads.
Can Arnold Schwarzenegger Direct Well?
Much of the film feels like scenes were shot without consideration given to how they should be filmed or how one scene leads into the next. This results in some bizarre editing choices. At one point, it feels like we’re in the middle of a conversation when a closeup of a character’s face suddenly dissolves into a tracking shot of Jones’ burned-down cabin.
In another instance, there’s a quick fade-in/fade-out transition that feels like it’s happening because the editor had nothing else to work with. Some pretty basic shots (like a wide shot of the exterior of a house) are poorly composed. In at least one scene, there’s a significant mismatch between shots that clearly took place on a soundstage and shots of body doubles out in the real world. There’s a 35-second long montage of a tree being cut down that feels like something directed by Tommy Wiseau. There are a lot of pointless zooms. It rarely feels like the camera is put somewhere for a reason. The pacing is way off. In sum, the direction is sloppy as hell.
Why Did Arnold Schwarzenegger Make 'Christmas in Connecticut'?
Christmas in Connecticut aims to be a Hallmark-esque holiday film with familiar themes of finding love, appreciating family, rejecting superficiality, and embracing wholesome values. For Arnold, an Austrian immigrant who longed to be an American, it’s easy to see why he finds these themes appealing. The film is very much of the Reagan/Bush era. It celebrates traditionalism and conventional gender roles. It’s not exactly a shock that the director of such a film would go on to become a Republican politician.
It seems like Schwarzenegger is pretty aware that his film was not exactly a creative triumph. He rarely, if ever, talks about directing Christmas in Connecticut. The film isn’t mentioned once in either his biographical Netflix docuseries or his autobiography Total Recall: My Unbelievably True Life Story, although his book does contain a passage about his passion for decorating Christmas trees. He’s never directed anything since.
Is 'Christmas in Connecticut' Worth Watching?
Christmas in Connecticut is an interesting glimpse of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s sensibilities beyond just pumping iron and being an action star. His decision to cast Kristofferson and Cannon in the lead roles demonstrates that he has a good eye for talent and knows how to work well with actors. The overall concept of the film isn’t totally off-base. With a rewrite and director change, Christmas in Connecticut might make for a solid Lindsay Lohan/Netflix-style holiday rom-com. For all these reasons, the film deserves to be seen by anyone interested in this one-of-a-kind weightlifter turned actor turned politician. Arnold Schwarzenegger is one of the most unique figures in American cinema and his sole directorial outing is nothing if not an interesting experiment.
